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 Casper Van Dien 11" x 14" |
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Starship Troopers 3: Marauder |
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Price Range: $18.99 - $24.99
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$18.99 |
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Starship Troopers 3: Marauder explodes with mind-blowing man-on-bug combat! Col. Johnny Rico (Casper Van Dien) is back to lead his team on a secret mission to rescue a small crew of troopers stranded on the remote planet of OM-1. Battling bugs, both new and old, the new "Marauder" advanced weapons technology may be their only hope against a treasonous element operating within the Federation itself. As Captain Lola Beck (Jolene Blalock) and the rest of the starship crew fight to survive in the harsh conditions, it begins to dawn on them that something on OM-1 is very, very wrong. This time the bugs have a secret weapon that could destroy humanity. Join the Mobile Infantry in this intergalactic action-packed adventure.
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The situation: Totally, ominously effed up, sir. -  |
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD Review |
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It must have taken a lot of work, but they managed to make the third movie in the series worse than the second. I've read the book, I've watched all 3 movies, and I've seen the CG cartoon, and the 3rd movie by far is the worst.
What could have been the one redeeming part about the movie, which also gives it's name to the movie: Marauder - ie Mechs, are wasted because they are not introduced until the end of the movie for about 1 minute of air time. This is also when the movie has it's obligatory nudity scenes, because you know you have to get naked before you get into a mech. The part I was most amused by: in the beginning of the movie, one of the characters says something so stupid that the actor next to her looks at her with this expression on his face of "Really, you just said that?" It sets the tone for the next two hours of stupidity. Read the book, watch the cg series, watch the 1st movie, if you must watch the 2nd movie, but you really can live without watching this. |
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So Bad It's Awesome -  |
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD Review |
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The title pretty much sums it up.
Starship Troopers 3:Marauder is a laugh riot. The Federation commercials are the only serious-looking part of the movie, and that is because they bear a darker undertone. Everything else is so inept, that it compels the viewer to make fun of it. This, all on its own, makes ST3 an extremely enjoyable movie, especially if it's a group experience. First off, the CGI is bad. So bad, it makes ST3 look much older then ST1. Spaceships, bugs, explosions, gunfire, and even planets look like they was taken from an older computer game and mixed with film clips. You can't help but laugh at the scenes of bugs exploding, followed by pieces of them bouncing off thin air. Second, the storyline and the script. While the overall idea was okay, the execution is full of crazy scenes (if the cook's hat going on fire without him noticing is gold, then the scene of a guy being shoved into an enormous toothed vagina is pure platinum), moronic dialogue (all the god-talk parts, you need to see it to believe it (all puns intended)), and a myriad of plot holes large enough to drive a Boeing 747 through (the mind-bogglingly named Dix is betrayed by some woman, his death is faked and he is supposedly going to be killed for real, when we see that he's fine and the woman is actually his ally, and the watchers are left to wonder why did they have to fake his death anyway etc.). The ending with the whole religion thing is, whether it's supposed to be satire or propaganda, so comical that it made me and my friends laugh until our bellies ached. Third, and the funniest of all, is the acting. I won't be exaggerating if I say pornography has better actors. Casper van Dien is terrible, but even he manages to appear competent when compared to the rest of the cast. The female lead's acting skills are almost as bad as Angelina Jolie's. The Christian girl and the Anoke guy act and talk like they are from another dimension. However, the one "actress" that absolutely deserves her own paragraph is Cecile Breccia. She is a sergeant (or just a trooper, or something) that has no other purpose but to remove her clothes for one of the longest (and the least subtle) nudity scenes I've ever seen. From the very first sentence she utters, I was sure that she was some kind of comic relief. She speaks with an accent so ridiculous, that it makes her sound like a cartoon character. In an interview, Breccia even mentions that Casper van Dien teased her for her "funny accent". Funny indeed! Overall, Starship Troopers 3:Marauder is a terrible movie. So terrible that it turned a full circle and became awesome. Buy, rent or borrow it, get a couple of beers and a few like-minded friends, and spend an evening watching and commenting on this masterpiece. Guaranteed entertainment. |
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Oddly Christian parable? -  |
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD Review |
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Its hard to tell what to make of this movie
It has lots of actiony goodness and seems to be a parable of the Iraqi war but then it becomes this oddly religious movie that either celebrates or mocks Christianity and it is hard to tell which. The religious aspects clearly don't belong in this, and one has to wonder if they had to put it in to get Casper Van Dien to participate, as he has got religion in recent years I don't know if I liked this movie or not-I think I would've had they NOT included the rediculous religious stuff. |
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I got religion! - |
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD Review |
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...The religion of hating crappy movies, that is. This one was actually pretty good throughout, until it became clear that the "Dis on the Fool Christian" motif was morphing into a "Clap Your Hands and Click Your Heels Three Times for Jesus and He'll Save You from All Physical Harm" motif. It was clear from almost the beginning that the Sky Marshal was a bug sympathizer, and ridiculous in the extreme to believe that he wouldn't have tipped his hand, til the end, that his conversion to religion was a conversion to bug religion.
Even more ridiculous is the tough female trooper getting on her knees and praying with the wimpy blonde at the end, culminating in rescue by their "angels." First, the tough female trooper was completely untrue to her character, up to this point in the movie, in going along with that. Second, yeah, there are lots of action movies where improbable rescues happen at just the right time, but for crying out loud, PAINT A BIG CRUCIFIX ON THE FRIGGIN' COVER OF THE DVD PACKAGE TO WARN US THAT THIS MOVIE IS A BIG FAT FAIRY-TALE ADVERTISEMENT FOR JESUS OF FRIGGIN' NAZARETH. I bought this movie to watch science fiction, not religious fiction. And why do I have to give it even one star? GIVE ME THE ABILITY TO GIVE A BOMB LIKE THIS NO STARS, PLEASE, AMAZON. *pant*pant*pant* ...nuff said. |
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It's about time! - |
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD Review |
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It's cheap, overdue, but casper is back and Verhoven is as sharp as ever with satire. If I had 200 million euros I could do a bang-up job on special effects. These guys probably had 2 mill. for the whole budget. I WANT MORE STARSHIP TROOPERS! |
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